Terms and Conditions
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, this missive (hereafter “The Greeting”)
“The Greeting” was created to meet social obligations associated with this time of year and without regard to race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference. It was created to be nondenominational, non-discriminatory, gender neutral, non-offensive, eco-friendly, socially-responsible, and gluten-free.
“The Greeting” is not intended to offend, alienadeeds. “The Greeting” is made only in the context to which it may be legally received, if in fact, it is received at all. It is not intended to be nor should it be, in any way, connected to any other type of greeting, real or imagined, past, present or future. No references to any persons, things or substances, animate or inanimate, real, fictional or otherwise should be assumed by the reader or receiver of the greeting (hereafter, ‘the greetee’).
The greeting is not being made to (nor will tenders be accepted from or on behalf of) non-believers in ‘The Greeting’ in any jurisdiction in which making and or accepting the greeting would violate that jurisdiction’s laws or feelings (also refer to local statutes and ordinances related to ’The Greeting’). In any jurisdiction in which perceived ‘greeting’ is not welcomed nor agreed upon by all ‘greetees’, then the ‘greetor’ of ‘The Greeting’ will be held harmless in this life and the next, including all issuing posterity both now and forever. ‘The Greeting’ may be made by a licensed ‘greetor’ and any liability assumed or created by the ‘greetee’ shall be the sole responsibility of said ‘greetor’.
If you have been aggrieved, offended, waylaid, parlayed, filleted or delayed in any way, either real, imagined or perceived by said ‘Greeting’ and or by ‘greetor’ as the result of receiving said ‘greeting’, you can call toll free 1-800- CHRISTMAS to speak with legal counsel.”
“The Greeting” is subject to amendment, clarification or withdrawal.
Greeting is at all times subject to withdrawal by Sender, and it may be cancelled or modified at any time, without notice to Receiver. In the event of cancellation, Receiver shall receive no credit or proration for any time left in Greeting Period. Greeting is not intended to be transferable, and has no cash value. Under no circumstances may Receiver in any way alter Greeting, or publish Greeting directly or indirectly without express written permission of Sender. Permission may be withheld for any reason within the sole discretion of Sender, with no rule of reasonableness.
Greeting should in no way be construed to guarantee or warrant happiness or other good feelings during Greeting Period, or warrant or guarantee an acceptable holiday. By accepting Greeting, Receiver expressly agrees that he or she assumes the risk for his or her own holiday. Receiver will hold Sender harmless should Receiver’s expectations for Greeting Period and wishes contained herein not coincide.
Sanity Clause: There is no sanity clause.
“The Greeting” is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher,
Should Receiver not accept the terms of Greeting listed above, no rights or benefits related to Greeting will accrue.
Should a dispute arise from Greeting, Receiver agrees that jthe matter is subject to adjudication in the Breckenridge Zone. Sender and Receiver agree that personal jurisdiction will lie within the Zone, regardless of the location of either party. Greeting will be construed under the Operating Manual of the Breckenridge Zone, without regard to Choice of Law or Renvoy.