Category Archives: Hmmm

Immutable Laws of Weirdness?

I found myself pondering the possible existence of a universal law of Weirdness or The Weird, along the lines of the law of gravity. If in the same way that a planet has mass and attracts passing asteroids to itself, does Weirdness have a pseudo-mass such that at a certain level of Weirdness it begins to attract any nearby Weirdness, thereby increasing the Weirdness in a given area or in a person’s life?

These days I will admit that my headspace has always contained a certain amount of Wyrd, that my world view could/can be considered from slightly to a great deal skewed.

For many years my mental illness together with the effect of being an adult child of alcoholism caused me to hide and suppress my idiosyncratic thought processes and off-beat way of seeing or thinking about the universe around me. With all the negative connotations, the stigma, associated with the words mental illness I certainly did not want mental illness linked in any manner to me. Growing up with an alcoholic parent is all about keeping secrets and you are as sick as your secrets.

You become fixated on appearing, being normal. You stuff any problems or issues until their mass reaches the point that it collapses in on itself becoming a black hole that devours your life. Perchance black hole, while colourful, is not quite accurate in that there is no escape from a black hole, while there is escape into recovery from mental illness and the ‘isms of being an adult child of alcoholism.

Escape is not easy requiring years of effort and a willingness to face your true self, to do the work needed to change the way you think about yourself and the universe around you.

As part of the recovery process I became comfortable in my own skin and instead of denying the writer, the words inside of me, my Chi, I set them free. In setting them free I set free a part of me I had locked up, setting ME free. With that freedom came not only acceptance of the fact my head can be a Weird place to dwell, but I came to treasure that Weirdness and the little spark of madness that is an essential part of ME.

This train of thought arose as I found myself holding a digital video camera, zoomed in on a piece of paper hand towel that was full of crap, zooming out and panning over to the SCN correspondent so he could comment on the philosophical, ethical and societal implications inherent in the existence of this crappy piece of paper towel.

No, no metaphor; I mean full of crap literally – as in someone had used it as toilet paper.

You are correct this scenario was just a little Weird. Hence my contemplating whether Weirdness has some bizarre sort of pseudo-mass that could attract more Weirdness into my vicinity and life. I began to wonder if in accepting, even treasuring, the Weird in my head and sharing my thoughts through writing had resulted in a pseudo-mass of sufficient magnitude that it had begun to pull this kind of Weirdness into my life.

The whole chain of fate(?) began innocently enough over a cup of coffee at a coffee house. Hmmmm, I suppose it would be more accurate to say that this chain of events began as a result of events I had observed and that had set my mind to wondering and my fingers to typing about the conduct of the Abbotsford Police Department (APD) in terms of Orwellian Big Brother-ism and a police state. I emailed this article off to Something Cool News, leading to an exchange of email that led to a phone conversation that resulted in the conversation over coffee.

The conversation began about some of the unacceptable behaviours the APD has been increasingly engaging in with respect to the homeless and this behaviour’s expansion even into negative treatment of youth members of a local church for daring to “encourage” the homeless by giving out sandwiches. As interesting conversations tend to do this conversation ranged outwards into broader discussion of homelessness and the uncaring treatment of the homeless and others in need in Abbotsford.

At some point in this wide-ranging discussion the correspondent spoke of his chance observation earlier in the day in Abbotsford of paper towelling that had been used as toilet paper by someone forced to use the great outdoors as a washroom. We passed on by this conversation point to talk of other improper APD behaviours and City Hall’s love of paying lip service to the epidemic of homelessness and poverty on the streets of Abbotsford while actually doing nothing to address these grave social problems.

We left the coffee house to shoot the video report on the observations of APD behaviour and the thoughts and concerns that the observed APD behaviour raised in my mind. When we had finished the video report the SCN correspondent returned to his observation of the soiled paper towelling and what it said about Abbotsford. Thus it was I found myself following him to the site of the paper towel sighting to help him make a video record and commentary.

I found myself on video putting context and comment into this pile of crappy paper towelling. Pointing out that in Abbotsford washrooms are for “Customer Use Only”; or that there are “No Public Washrooms” in stores; that the keys to the locked washrooms of gas stations are not handed to the homeless; that while at the Clearbrook Library branch the washrooms are not locked, at the downtown MSA Library branch beside Jubilee Park the washrooms are locked and accessible only with a key.

Thus it is that the homeless are forced to either hold it in indefinitely or urinate and defecate outdoors like animals. Perhaps, even less than animals considering that just the day before I had seen a business truck whose business was cleaning up after people’s dogs.

I touched briefly upon what this says about Abbotsford, particularly in light of the (false) pride so many take in all the churches in Abbotsford and how very “Christian” Abbotsford is. This led to reflecting on the question of just how Christian it is that a community with all the wealth and resources of Abbotsford does not find the homeless situation intolerable and take the necessary steps to end homelessness and address poverty in Abbotsford.

When we had finished taping the commentary on the paper towelling and the treatment of the homeless in Abbotsford, I could not resist taking advantage of having a conversational associate to bounce a somewhat heretical train of thought off of.

It occurred to me that despite their claims to be Christians many, if not most, of those who name themselves as Christians behave in a totally Un-Christian manner. They appear totally willing to sacrifice the homeless and the poor in order that they not be required to put forth effort or even worse – money – in simple Christian charity.

Given that blasphemy is defined as: profane or contemptuous speech, writing or action concerning God. Are not all those who label themselves Christian but behave in the most Un-Christian of ways, committing contemptuous actions concerning God? Are not their actions in showing disrespect and contempt for the golden rule, the parable of the Good Samaritan, the admonition to love your fellow man and so forth, profane?

Do they not then Blaspheme?

Does it not follow that rather than being the most Christian of communities, that through their actions these self-labelled “Christians” in fact cause Abbotsford to be the most Blasphemous of Communities?

So there we were in between the two parts of the video commentary on the implications contained within these soiled paper towels, debating whether, in their inactions and uncaring indifference to the homeless the smugly superior Christian community does blaspheme? After a moment for both of us to reflect on that question we concluded: How could it not be blasphemy?

I then found myself holding a digital video camera, zoomed in on a piece of paper hand towel that was full of crap, zooming out and panning over to the SCN correspondent so he could make a comment on the philosophical, ethical and societal implications inherent in the existence of this crappy piece of paper towel.

As we shook hands and parted company I found myself reflecting on just how much and often the Weird enters into my life. This is only to be expected if there is a universal law of Weirdness along the lines of the law of gravity. The Implication being that I can expect increasing amounts of the Weird in my life as the increasing pseudo-mass of the Weird around me attracts more and more Weirdness.

There is no point in worrying about an immutable law of the universe regarding which I can do nothing. Besides it should fill my life with creativity, interesting challenges, and passion and prove to be downright fun.

Is a simple coffee simply coffee?

A short time ago a forwarded email came to me asking if I knew anyone in need of help. There was a church group who wanted to help some of their fellow Abbotsfordians in getting on their feet and moving forward with their lives. Toward that end they had requested suggestions for people they could help. The person they made the request of forwarded it on, it was forwarded on and so on until it landed in my email box.

It was heartening to hear of people interested in making a difference, who had gotten together to take positive action on their own initiative without waiting around for instructions. What I particularly liked about their approach is they wanted it to be hands on, not looking strictly to give money or some other material object, although such actions were a possibility. They were looking to be involved with the people they would be helping on a continuing basis over the year.

One of the realities I have observed is that continuing support is needed to help achieve a successful outcome in changing lives. Your time, concern and a willingness to listen and just talk are in many ways far more important a contribution than merely material items be they money, furniture, food etc.

We often forget that Man is a social animal. For years due to mental illness and other issues I was a loner, able to go for days (weeks or months at my lowest point) without seeing or interacting with people. One of my concerns as my recovery progressed was slipping back into that isolation. It turned out one of my counsellors was correct; I had reached a point in my recovery where I could not comfortably go back to being a loner.

I am still sometimes surprised by my need these days for social interaction, make that healthy social interaction. What with car troubles and other looming changes life has been a little stressful lately. A good friend called and we did coffee, finishing just minutes ago.

Some of the conversation was about the car and forthcoming changes, but most was about other interesting things going on in Abbotsford and our lives. Being able to sit down and write this comment on the “help needed” email and the thoughts it raised in my mind, is a reflection of what a calming, centering effect a simple coffee and conversation can have.

I also really liked the education possibilities. The church group would get the opportunity to know the people involved and see past the stereotypes; get to observe the many barriers that have come to exist in our society and its structure for those trying to get on with their lives after some problem or trauma had knocked them down; they would also see what difference even simple actions like sharing a coffee can have.

For those who would be on the receiving end of the help there would be the opportunity to change mental thought patterns. It is amazing just how negative an effect on your thought processes, patterns and outlook the beating your mind, your Self, takes in being homeless, addicted, poor or just on a unlucky streak has. An important aspect of your recovery turns out to be to change your way of thinking, of perceiving.

It is an idea with plenty of potential on both sides of the equation, the catch?

Even off the tops of people’s heads and on short notice the list of those in need in our community was overwhelming, far outstripping what this group could do. The request revealed a breadth and depth of need that is daunting and a little frightening.

It is perhaps a little damning that we as a community have failed to see this need and have allowed it to become so deep and wide spread. As a positive balance to this, those forwarding the request are working on finding ways to address the rest of the listed needs.

In that lies what is truly needed for our City, Canadian society, to begin to successfully address the social ills and problems we face: the involvement of the people of the community in helping other members of the community. Sitting around, waiting for someone to tell you what to do, fancy planning or plans will not do it.

The beginning of the end of social ills lies with people simply getting out, getting together and taking actions to address what is needed.

denouement

It was not unexpected for me in the course of this week to today, Friday August 10, 2007, be given a letter from the Salvation Army serving notice to move from residence at the Salvation Army.

My biggest worry about moving on is that at my car is not running well. So if you know someone would could donate their time to get my VW running at least semi-well and passing Air Care or has a station wagon or van (I am not a small person) for sale cheap …. send me an email at homelessinabbotsford@hotmail.com.

Better yet if you know someone who has a place to rent out at a low rental price OR someone who has an employment need for a literate, computer friendly ex-accountant with a passion for bringing about social change. Send them my way or my email address.